Anxiety
Writing Away Anger
It’s been a tough week. I don’t even know why, to be honest. Everything is normal. Nothing crazy is happening. Maybe it’s just the season, or the heat, or whatever. I could sit here and feel sorry for myself (and I do that, plenty). It’s really tempting. Let me just sit and mull over how…
Read MoreDear Self: There Are Some Things You Need to Know
A letter I wrote to myself after a bit of a meltdown: Alright, Ashley. There are some things you need to know about how to live. You don’t really know them yet, but maybe by the time you check out of this life, you’ll have a marginal understanding of these things. We can only hope.…
Read MoreI Stopped Being Grateful
The kitchen is dark except for the counter lights under the cabinets. My favorite sign is leaning against the wall on the counter, “This Kitchen Is For Dancing”. We’ve danced so many times in this kitchen. I stopped being grateful for this house. What a mistake. A ceramic angel is watching me, next to a…
Read MoreSometimes I Cry For No Reason. It’s Weird.
A picture might say a thousand words, but this picture doesn’t tell the whole story. You’d never know from this picture that just 20 minutes ago, I was sobbing into my husband’s shoulder. You wouldn’t know from this picture that about an hour ago, I was snapping at my children if they so much as…
Read More3 Actions To Help Overcome Anxiety
Anxiety is a funny thing. Sometimes it looks like anger, overthinking, people pleasing, or codependency. Fear can be a good thing, though. Don’t drive 100 mph, you could die. Don’t pick up that snake, you could die. “Don’t say hi to that stranger, you could die,” isn’t quite the same, is it? No, that doesn’t…
Read MoreMy Pros & Cons for Taking Medication in Sobriety
When I quit drinking, I stopped all other substances of any kind, prescribed or otherwise. For a while. At 10 months sober, I got an impacted wisdom tooth as my 30th birthday present. It hurt. Badly. They removed it without any anesthesia, just numbed my mouth and got it over with. Ouch. Lots of ouch.…
Read MoreWe Will Not Regret The Past – Really
“We will not regret the past nor wish to shut the door on it.” Even as my eyes struggled to open, waves of regret would start crashing against my entire body. Oh, my God. Ugh. Ugh ugh uggghh. Shame and regret were so familiar to me, I didn’t even recognize them as emotions separate from…
Read MoreAnxiety: The Thorn in My Flesh
“Therefore, in order to keep me from becoming conceited, I was given a thorn in my flesh, a messenger of Satan, to torment me. Three times I pleaded with the Lord to take it away from me. But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will…
Read More4 Ways To Overcome Perfectionism
What is perfectionism? Short answer: paralysis. Whether it’s visible or not on the outside, perfectionism often looks like chaos and disorder. It’s the exact opposite of what we strive to achieve. Perfectionism shows up in my life as an immobilizing fear of failure. It looks a lot like depression because it is so closely linked.…
Read MoreNever Good Enough: The Futility of Striving to Meet Others’ Expectations
Note from Ashley: I asked Randy to write a guest post for me, after coming across his book and story in a Facebook group. His post on his blog, The Question I Never Asked Myself, hit me in all the emotions and I may or may not have teared up. I asked him to expand on…
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