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Posts by Ashley Ann

I’m Still Here

It’s been a few years, eh? 2020 was a doozy for everyone, and I was no exception. I’m here, I’m alive, I’m ok. Unfortunately, I don’t have the same sobriety date anymore, and I’m not sure how to address that in the “right” way except just as honestly as I can. Recovery is hard. I’ve…

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Food: The Never Ending Struggle

It’s 4:26am, and my coffee tastes delicious. I’m not stoked about being awake this early, but if I must be, at least I can enjoy some good coffee. We are creatures of habit. My mornings look almost identical most days – the only difference, lately, is the time they start. Waking up at 3am and…

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Going Quiet In A Noisy World

kids hiding from responsibility victim codependent hiding away

I’ve been off social media for about a week now. There’s nothing new or groundbreaking about taking a break from particular apps. I’ve done it a few times, many others have done it, especially during Lent or for New Year’s Resolutions and the like. This time though, it feels different somehow. I honestly don’t miss…

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Fly Through the Fiery Sky

birds flying sunset

Fly through the fiery sky Alive with fear Grasping at stars Burning with hope The seasons of shame Forever wax and wane Fear and trust balancing On the edge of your sanity Darkness pulls from below Light beckons from above Spread your wings And fly through the fiery sky -bloominash (aka me) I don’t have…

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Drunk Me Is Not The Real Me

drunk me is not the real me

I can’t tell you how many times I’ve heard people say things like, “Whatever you say drunk is what you really want to say when you’re sober,” or “Drunk you only does what sober you wants to do.” This may be true for some people, but I’m going to go ahead and call BS on…

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Raising Daughters and Turning 33

happy birthday sober birthday

I’ll be 33 years old tomorrow. When you’re an adult, the milestone birthdays are mostly decades. Your 30’s, 40’s, 50’s, and so on. The middle numbers aren’t quite as Big to most people. Last month, I had an abnormal pap smear for the first time ever. Yesterday, I had outpatient surgery to remove the culprit(s).…

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Small Acts of Defiance

dark hallway depression and sobriety-min

Why get better? What’s the point? Apathy offers to numb everything for me. I crave it, I don’t want to give a shit about anything. It’s much easier to function in this world that way. If I don’t think too much about anything, I can coast without any real emotions. Emotions are unpredictable, and they…

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Embracing My Inner Pollyanna

woman with balloons no apologies for positive attitude bloominash

When I was younger, a few people mocked me for being too positive. I was too much of a Pollyanna, it was nauseating and I was naive. Or at least that’s what I was told. I don’t know why it affected me the way it did. None of those people are still in my life,…

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